MAN (in act 2 – HUSBAND)
CHAIR (in act 2 – BROTHER-IN-LAW)
BED (in act 2 – WIFE)
TABLE (in act 2 – FATHER-IN-LAW)
BOOKCASE (in act 2 – FRIEND)
It is as simple as that: a man wants to start life anew. Buys new furniture into his naked room. A chair, a bed, a table. Then and there conflicts begin, misunderstandings, tough relations (pieces of furniture, like in Andersen’s fairytales, are alive, acted by people).
In Act 2 the world is constructed: the Man is married; actors playing parts of furniture become his friends and family. Real drama blows up, by the end of which the Man comes to a conclusion that he should start everything over again.
The performance may be as funny as clowns’ performance, but by the end feelings of the audience become more and more complicated. This is the case with all plays of Slapovsky where the spectators ask themselves: “Is it really as funny as it seemed?”
Excerpt:
CHAIR. He can’t go without a family. Nature says so.
TABLE. A lady is a lady. She will dust the table and take good care of everything.
CHAIR. There will be children. They, suckers, will tread the chair.
BED. And the bed too. Screw them! A woman is needed. Maybe not one. In turns. That’s life.
CHAIR. Such a mess it is, not life. If a woman is not a mistress - she becomes a real pig. She can’t get more satisfaction then with dirtying in someone else’s house.
BOOKCASE. Leave the master alone!
CHAIR. No one gave you the floor. You were the last to appear here. Be modest.
BED. A man’s house is his castle!
CHAIR. New word – castle, don’t know it. What is a castle?
BOOKCASE. Castle – is a large building formerly occupied by a ruler and fortified against attack.
CHAIR. Cut it! Here he goes to our own harm! Man stuffed him with books so here he comes throwing up quotations. Has nothing of his own.
BOOKCASE. The so called “own” is in reality the unconscious of someone else. The real “own”, the new idea emerges once in a hundred years in one of a million people.
CHAIR. Did you read that somewhere or reasoned that yourself?
BOOKCASE. Reasoned that out. Leave a Man to think. He is thinking. He is deciding what book to read.
MAN. Yes, that’s right… I need to read something… Something like… (Chooses the book. Puts it aside. Then another one. Throws it to the floor in anger – then another one, and another one. There is a pile of books on the floor).
BOOKCASE. What’s the matter? I am surprised: he picked the books himself – and now he is annoyed! Or has he read everything?
BED. Hardly so. He probably picked them on the principle “this is a must”, but not on the principle “this is what I like”. There lies a whodunit. Take it. Nice cover: a naked woman lies covered with blood. Take it. You are willing to do so. Why do you keep looking for something sophisticated? Who are you shooting a line to? Yourself?
MAN. Indeed. I’ll take a whodunit. I want and I will read a whodunit.
BED. Sublimation. He needs a woman.
Aleksey Slapovsky
